Rhys' phone.

Im happy I made you laugh I don't even feel ridiculous I don't remember a thing abt that night God Mexico is life, we should meet there in 60 years and pee in the sea " Fuck you our cocks still work !" Really ? My haircut is bad ? You hurt my feelings ! Dude I already did all my hot friends but I don't mind sharing my bachelor list with you Ginny wouldn't knooow she's waaay too busy Come on you need loooove and I have plenty for youuuu :loove: ( ok this is freaky )

Tu veux te porter volontaire ? Pas question, c'est toi qui te déplaces, la porte est ouverte, viens.

OMG you are sooo old ( okay Im a year younger but you are oooooold ) I bet you will get bald way before me I have tones of sexy friends don't underestimate my charms   Okay maybe there is one I've never been intimate with    She's a friend but I guess brocode first   I will tell Gonny you are a dushbag ! Do it yourself
Okay I kinda don't like to share your attention but you are into boobs n' booties I'm sad ( )  

Des secrets ? Tu te prends pour gossip girl ? Ouais, reste chez toi, tu veux que je mette de la musique pour t'endormir ?

Screw you, I just firgured out that I'll be 30 yo in almost 5 years too ! Why did you do this to me ? I don't need to drink to be charming Im cooler just deal with it or die trying YOU made a whole fuss abt the brocode, I'm just following your lead. I always knew it was a waste for you, my tastes in women are THE BEST. Now that I'm with Gonny ( Trying to make it look like a new nickname ) I guess we can skip some rules ( OMG you with my exs so weird. But if you're happy and I can make jokes abt it - I can't complain :drunk: )
Im not a girl, sorry dude. But we still can be friends. It's not you. It's me. ( My favourite breakup punchline ) ( #looser ) 

We are eternal, I bet our souls are never getting old. You write the essay abt brocode and I do a poem abt old age Tell her abt the Gonny thing and i'll spread a rumor abt you having a third nipple ! I swear I'll photoshop our vacation pics ! You wish you had the whole cake ( me ) but I'm afraid it's too late now. You are doomed without ever tasting the flavour of true love. LMAO you are a bastard. It's not lying it's courtesy - Dude you make me wanna grab a pack of beer and come to your place. We can make fart noises so loud that Remy would be pissed ( Okay this is nonsense we are grown ups ) ( But i'll do it if you do it ) ( THIS you can't tell Gonny )

saaaaaay you'll see me again even if it's just in your wildest dreams (allez, c'est cadeau) mais arrête de te plaindre, si tu veux, je peux toujours chanter.

Maybe we should meet abt the bower thing. Theodore R. 

Ton équipe en carton a gagné le championnat, ça mérite au moins que tu payes l'apéro tu crois pas ? J'espère que tout roule, profites de ton titre veinard.  

You really are a child Don't spread rumors about me, or at least be more inventive. I mean the third nipple story is more fun to tell I'm just trying to help you with you sex issues; you should be more gratefull to me. Remy is a freakshow I mean did you ever watched GOT with her ? She's all whinny I'm coming to your place I have some high quality weed but Gonny ( FUCK, I just realised it sounds like a dude's name !! ) doesn't like the idea. I can't live without smoking.